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 At twenty-years-old, Becca Scott thought she finally had her life under control. With the help of the people around her, she was able to deal with her traumatic childhood and let go of the pain that haunted her every day. But one unexpected encounter at a lake house would stir up every dark emotion she worked so hard to forget.


There wasn’t anyone Aiden Ryan hated more than himself. Plagued with a life filled with manipulation and regret, he will try anything to ignore the guilt that eats him alive, even if it means more pain for him in the long run. It’s not until he meets Becca that things start to change. There’s only one problem - he’s stuck in a relationship he can’t get out of with a woman he doesn’t care about.


Love is complicated, but when two people have demons they refuse to face, love could destroy them. Together, Becca and Aiden try and let go of their painful pasts to be together, but will their pasts let go of them?

I previously read this book for the first time back in April.  I remembered some of the scenes that made me laugh like when Becca saved Jeremy from the five girls that were trying to get is attention.  How Aiden instantly wanted to protect Becca from every distressing thing in life.  Their love story took off quickly and blossomed into a beautiful time for each of them.  Then I started remembering why I gave it a three star rating. 

Becca was running from a reality in the past that she wasn’t willing to deal with yet.  She used her own vices to keep things covered and had created protective walls around her that prevented anyone from getting to know the real woman inside. Toni warned Aiden right away, if you want the answers to his questions he will have to break her defenses and that just isn’t done. She was attracted to Aiden when she saw him but it scared her because he wasn’t the normal type of man that she would be attracted to, not to mention he had a girlfriend Vanessa. 

Aiden wasn’t free from skeletons in his closet but he was also trapped in his relationship with the girlfriend.  With a mother that makes Mommy Dearest look like a saint, he struggled to find a reason to upset the balance and go after what he really wanted.  It wasn’t till he met Becca that he discovered his reason.  His protectiveness towards her started early and soon he had the courage to call it quits with his now ex-girlfriend and find a path to Becca. Strangely with all the warnings he had about how Becca won't let men into her heart, he found the magic and it wasn't long till they were together.

As the story unfolds, the truth about each of their past and the betrayals that happen will surface and life just keeps kicking them in the butt.  It is one thing after another with those two, which for my personal taste was a bit much. I am not talking about them back and forth fighting either, it was outside interference and people's agenda that was most often the theme to this story.  I just wanted to scream for others to leave them alone.   Aiden was a dream, he was patient and willing to hold her until she was strong enough to fix herself and I liked that she finally found a reason to become vulnerable again to a man.

Without spoiling the book I will warn you that there are some scenes that I expected to be more intense and explosive, but they weren’t.  I am still a bit confused on aspect to her past and how this really works in reality but I remind myself this was fiction.  The relationship itself between Aiden and Becca was intense, seeing them clean up their past messes and come clean with each other was exciting enough.  I didn’t need all of the twists and turns that this book had. Unfortunately by the time I finished the book, my favorite characters were two of the secondary people, Jeremy and Toni.  They made me laugh and I was in love with them by the middle of the book.  I love drama like any other reader but for me, this was just overdone, but if you are a drama junkie and love a well written romance story with endearing characters who never get a chance to stop and smell the roses and enjoy their life,  you have found a winner in this book.  

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Aiden's POV 

“Hey Ya” by Outkast began playing over the stereo. Becca started doing a sexy wiggle without thinking, so I led her to where her friend had pushed the furniture aside to make room for dancing. “Toni hates new music. She only listens to stuff from the 90’s and early 2000’s,” Becca whispered. The tequila made her voice become husky and was going to trash the rest of my self-control. 

I grabbed her waist and pulled her body tight against mine. My hips started to sway us back and forth. Her upper body turned and undulated across my chest and stomach. Her tiny hands slid across my chest and around my neck. I could tell she was slender looking at her, but holding her I realized her clothes were hiding a fantastic body. She had soft curves, but she also had tight muscles pulling while she danced. 

I looked into her jade green eyes. She was really very pretty. All peaches and cream skin surrounded by dark red hair. I’m sure girls have a different name for the color, dark red softened by tones of brown. It was so thick and soft. I love long hair on girls, and hers fell most of the way down her back.  

I might be a bastard, but my resistance was slipping. I leaned in and gently nibbled the tender skin of her neck. I felt her try to suppress a moan. I took my right hand from her waist and buried it in the hair at the back of her neck and went in for a kiss. 

K.D. CARRILLO

K. D. Carrillo is a graduate of Central Washington University, the setting of Self Destruct. Her days are spent with her son, her rescued Aussie, and usually with a book.

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